An Open Letter to the A-Hole Who Broke My Heart on the Train Tonight

Hey Dude,

We didn’t formally meet, but I know you now.  I have your face memorized, and if I ever see you again, I will tell you so many things that I meant to say tonight but I couldn't. I couldn't say anything because I knew that if I walked up to you, I would just tear up and kinda cry and probably hit you, but not really hard enough. It would be the way I hit people in my dreams, where I’m trying as hard as I can it just doesn’t affect them.

You see, tonight you did something that you probably didn’t even notice. If you did, you probably chuckled to yourself at how clever you were, or how quick witted you are, and went about your night, but I’ve thought about you for the past 6 hours. Tonight, you sir, are a A*% Hole. You see what you probably don’t remember is that when you boarded the train a young girl was walking through the cars asking for money. I ride the train every day, I know this girl. She’s not a regular. She’s not the guy who sells headphones. She’s not the really small guy who’s super excited about riding his bike and won’t shut up about be a “cyclist!” She’s not the creepy guy that looks like Jafar, and she certainly isn’t the deaf guy who yells “COME ON MAN!” at people when they don’t respond to his sign. She’s different.

Ya see Douche Bag, this girl and I have had a conversation. She’s younger than me, and what you don’t get is that this girl who lives on the streets, actually sees good in people. See dude, this girl’s life sucks. I know you may have never thought about what it takes to get on the streets at a young age, and what a young girl might have to use as currency when she’s stuck in that kind of situation. Actually, I pray to God that you’ve never thought about it. I hope it’s never crossed your mind, because if it has, you deserve to be shot. When that girl walked passed you and asked for money, you attacked her. You publicly embarrassed her. You took a human who lives a life of shame and guilt and pain and you jumped on an opportunity to yell at and demean her because you saw her as a nuisance, and as less than you.

See dude, I had my hand in my wallet; I was going to help that girl tonight because one time she helped me out.  One time I accidentally gave her $100 on my way to turn it in for work and she brought it back to me, cause she knew that it was probably a mistake. She said to me, “I know that people who don’t have a lot, are the people who give the most, cause they understand. They’ve been there.” I owe that girl my job because of her honesty.

Mr. Jerk Wad, you are the kind of person we all know. You’re the guy who lectures the Barista on how to make his beverage faster. You’re the guy who tells his server how to be a good server. You’re the guy who honks at people trying to safely turn right on red. We all hate you. You know everything, so you felt the need to yell at this girl and give her “some tips” on how to get more money out of people. You suggested that she “Stand in front of a grocery store with a list, or maybe go somewhere where people care, or somewhere where there is some, f*%$ing food!” then you called her an idiot, and oh boy did you look smart and strong and witty and great. 

She just hung her head and got off the train. She didn’t even get the money I was trying to give her. So Dude Bro, I’m mad. I’m mad that you took an opportunity away from me to give, and I’m more mad that I couldn’t make my mouth move enough to tell you all of these at that moment. I just stood there fuming. I couldn’t do a thing.  Then I remembered what she said to me a few months back, and I realized that you, Sir Flaming Piece of Poo, don’t get it. You haven’t been there, so you don’t get it. But you will.

Everyone gets there. Everyone hits rock bottom at some time. Maybe you won’t end up on the streets, maybe you won’t ever truly understand drug addiction, but someday you’ll get it. Maybe you’ll lose your job, maybe your idol will tell you that you aren’t talented, maybe the love of your life will leave you, maybe you’ll have a stroke  (if we're lucky maybe you'll lose the ability to speak), or maybe you’ll wake up and realize that you’re a pathetic human who gets a good laugh while demeaning another human in a very real situation, and you’ll have to deal with that. But I hope when you hit the bottom of your pathetic existence, you remember that moment, when you saw an 18 year old homeless girl ask you for help and you yelled at her. Then you watched her hang her head and just leave because of your cruel words. I hope you remember that and I hope you correct your ways.  

I also hope that you get a paper cut every day until that moment, and if I ever see you on the train, I will probably call you a very rude name and mace you (I know I will in turn be maced cause it’s a train but it will be sooooo worth it)